Life In Flow

What Does it Mean to Be a Woman?

Life In Flow — Thu, 30 Apr 2026 12:50:40 GMT

Greetings!

In this episode, we let the word woman move through us and follow where it leads.

How do we claim and hold our power and what makes it leak?

What is our true shape if there is any? And what happens if it’s not afforded?

Are we learning or rather remembering something about ourselves?

That was a space where a lot of questions emerged. That we’ve been living since.

We cherish your presence, and joining us in flowing.

Irina, Polina and Yulia

These conversations are open explorations, that become richer with time and participation of others. We’d be thrilled to have you participate, if there was something that touched you. By commenting here, or sending us a message.

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Some Things That Wanted to Be Said:

“My power leaks when I am not afforded my true shape”
“You are like water. You always take the form of the one with whom you are.”
“It’s not about what we’ve learned about being a woman — it’s about what we haven’t yet remembered.”
“Power is about having a choice. You have a choice to change your mind. It is your power”.
“Is there a distinction between our true selves and what we’ve learned to be? The thing is everything we’ve experienced — learned, inherited, remembered — is still ours to claim. It’s all still us.”
“We have wings made of light. We have fangs made of crystal. We have claws of a wildcat. What is a true shape of a woman?”
“We are infinite inside. We might have outside borders, but within we are limitless.”
“When I lose connection to my center, my power leaks. Words disappear. Things I never knew could be forgotten — forgotten.”
“When there’s no need for reproduction anymore, all of a sudden there’s a lot of energy to direct wherever you want. Menopause is not a loss of power — it’s an integration of power.”

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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00:00 – Entering the Field: What Does It Mean to Be a Woman?
01:15 – A Somatic Experiment: Feeling “Woman” in the Body
06:01 – Portals, Warmth, and Safety: First Embodied Responses
08:43 – Infinite Within Borders: The Feminine as Inner Cosmos
10:16 – Air, Water, and the Wolf: Elemental Feminine Imagery
12:41 – “Woman is Like Water”: Taking Shape in Relationship
15:13 – Creation and Destruction: Dark Feminine Energy
17:33 – Holding It All: Softness, Rage, and Power Together
19:20 – Wings, Claws, and Fangs: Archetypes of Feminine Power
21:06 – What Does Power Feel Like in a Woman’s Body?
26:36 – Goddess States, Nature, and Embodied Power
33:03 – Power Through Connection, Attunement, and Aliveness
37:00 – “Not Afforded My True Shape”: When Power Leaks
43:11 – Losing Power: Approval, Disconnection, and Self-Doubt
56:09 – What Is Truly “Me” vs Learned? Identity, Memory, and Choice

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Music “Echolocation” by airtone, source: CcMixter

Individual vs Collective — Who Wins?

Life In Flow — Thu, 16 Apr 2026 13:56:38 GMT

Greetings!

You are in for a winding exploration.

We started with a sneaky question — choosing individual or collective. So, flow found a way out of the duality.

What started as a philosophical, although somewhat experimental, inquiry into utopia and egoless society got shapeshifted by the feminine that it was suggested: “says ‘yes, and.’ Improv might just have been developed by women.”

So what would it look like if there is no need to choose “either-or”? And how do we hold space for both polarities at the same time? Is utopia coming soon? (We wish).

We cherish your presence, and joining us in flowing.

Irina, Polina and Yulia

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Some Things That Wanted to Be Said:

“Sensing into this without making sense — this is what it felt like.”
“If currently individuality is being packaged in the same patterns and the same ways of being, then wouldn’t Utopia be actually the opposite of both individuality and collectiveness?”
“Sometimes you need to limit yourself to start appreciating something in a new light.”
“What can emerge if we hold these two positions together?”
“The feminine just hijacked the conversation — and maybe that’s exactly what needed to happen.”
“These words were not created for me. They do not describe the operating self of me.”
“What if individuality and collectivism aren’t opposites — but a duality the feminine has always known how to hold?”
“Maybe we don’t need a new utopia. Maybe we need a new language first.”
“The masculine says ‘yes, but.’ The feminine says ‘yes, and.’ Improv might just have been developed by women.”

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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Chapters

00:00 Intro
01:16 Welcome & the question: individual vs collective — who wins?
05:52 The rules of the game: no “I,” no “you”
09:20 Game Round 1: What is Utopia?
15:35 Game Round 2: The human blockchain and the vibrating web
21:31 Why removing “I” changes what emerges
23:55 Creative limitation: dropping “I,” “you,” and “we”
25:00 The Dispossessed: can an egoless society function?
31:00 Ego as the “operating self”
34:12 Duality, non-duality, and the porous individual
39:56 Wouldn’t utopia welcome the ego?
41:28 The language problem: these words were made by men
43:25 Redefining “duality”
44:30 The feminine as “Yes, And”
48:56 How do we hold both polarities at once?
52:58 “Yes, And” as a principle of utopia
54:02 Spanish Revolution and the limits of hearing all voices
57:20 Tribes, time, and what “collective” really includes
1:00:40 Practicality as a masculine perspective
1:03:25 Wrapping up: lifting the creative limitations
1:04:50 The feminine “hijacked” this conversation
1:05:45 Takeaways: celebrating “Yes, And” — but who builds the roads?
1:09:10 More yang in the yin, more yin in the yang
1:10:31 Sensing into this without making sense
1:13:45 Invitation to listeners & farewell
1:15:05 Outro

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Music “Echolocation” by airtone, source: CcMixter

Should We Strive To Be Understood?

Life In Flow — Thu, 02 Apr 2026 12:05:35 GMT

Greetings!

You are in for another blindfolded conversation. How much are we not seeing with our eyes open. What could reveal itself when seeing is done through senses besides eyes?

So, our invitation for you is to consider listening with your eyes closed. We’d be curious to hear from you on this.

In this episode we explore the word "understand," sense the longing for shared reality, and consider whether true understanding is about energetic resonance that goes beyond words. You are in for shared codes, morphic fields, dancing one’s PhD.

Whether each of us is seen and truly understood remains a question. 😜 We would be curious to hear your opinion.

In flow,

Irina, Polina and Yulia

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Some Things That Wanted to Be Said:

Irina

“To be understood is like being the wind welcomed by the branches of the tree.”
“The longing for feeling understood is longing for a shared reality.”
“You can’t tune the piano just once and then it will play the fine tune forever. You need to tune it periodically. It’s the same with our skill of attunement: it needs to be constantly honed.”
“Understanding without words — sometimes the words are coming from different coding systems, but understanding might still emerge if there is attunement at the deeper level.”
“Darkness definitely helps with the attunement and tuning into shared reality beyond words.”
“If I want to feel understood more, it’s also about how I am tuned into the world.”

Polina

“Can you feel me beyond the words? Can you expand your listening and receiving capacity to really feel me beyond the veil?”
“Understanding is like cuddling with your dog — full nervous system co-regulation, sweet unencumbered trust, and merging energetically while being totally different species.”
“If I don’t have clarity of what my desire is internally, how can I expect the other to understand me? it’s like setting everyone up for failure from the get go.”
“Words are code. The actual subtle energetics behind the words is the key to really receiving what someone is communicating.”
“I often experience with the masculine that they only want to understand me from their reference point — I have to fit into their framework. That doesn’t make me feel received.”
“Being understood is not about someone occupying my reality. It’s about there being space for my reality alongside theirs.”

Yulia

“The sense of being understood and the longing being satisfied came from being in nature. It’s so much easier to be understood — maybe because there are fewer layers than we humans have for making meaning.”
“I’ve had very precious experiences of being seen by non-humans.”
“To be understood is like seeing all of a sudden so much wisdom and shapes in a cloud that was just passing by.”
“I thought I understood the process of being understood. It turns out I don’t.”
“Maybe if we make space for worlds of others that don’t need to be similar to ours, that’s a good proxy for being understood.”
“Those fleeting moments of being deeply understood — one moment can expand into an eternity or a universe.”
“Maybe darkness and removing the visual stream could be the practice for being understood and understanding better.”

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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00:00 Intro
01:16 Welcome & the question of being understood
05:58 Game: Unpacking the word “understand”
16:35 Game: “To be understood is like…” — beyond the human world
24:08 Into the darkness: masks on
25:25 What does it mean to be understood?
37:26 How often do we truly feel understood?
44:01 Being seen vs being understood
48:48 Men vs Women
50:12 What does it take to be understood?
54:03 Can we be understood in our confusion?
59:49 The longing for shared reality
1:04:31 Dance Your PhD & stepping out of your coordinate system
1:11:43 Altered states and the depth of understanding
1:18:04 The darkness experiment: what did it reveal?
1:19:41 Can understanding last?
1:27:11 Attunement, shared codes and morphic fields
1:30:44 Parting reflections
1:34:56 Outro

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How Do We Hold Space for Ourselves?

Life In Flow — Thu, 19 Mar 2026 10:43:48 GMT

Spring greetings!

Wishing you to be penetrated by the new life and love that the air is humming with.

This episode was recorded with the three of us being blindfolded. Experimenting with senses and sensing bodies and how they affect the group space and flow. And we enjoyed the capacity to hold focus and be present that eye-masks generously granted us.

So, our invitation for you is to consider listening with your eyes closed. We’d be curious to hear from you on this.

During this conversation we moved through different ways of understanding “holding space”: as presence, as energetic containment, as an expanded sense of self that can include multiple experiences without being overwhelmed by them. Again and again, we sensed tension between the instinct to reach outward versus the capacity to stay inward.

Holding space for yourself is not easy or given. Yet, without it, our new becomings are wobbly and risk never hatching in this world. So, let’s go through all the labour of holding ourselves with care and love that we can be so generous with when it comes to others.

In flow,

Irina, Polina and Yulia

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Some Things We Are Taking With Us:

“At first it seemed to me that holding space was just standing there and doing nothing. But when I was in that role, the amount of energy moving through me was immense.”

“It’s not just that you stand there and be there. You are physically holding everything that is going on with your presence, your attention, your energy.”

“The first impulse is to help, to take some of the other person’s pain. But actually, finding your center is the real support.”

“You don’t need any training to sense when someone is holding space for you.”

“It’s possible to hold everything without being inside of it.”

“Unless you have some working knowledge of who you are, it’s hard to truly hold space for yourself.”

“Holding space for yourself is creating a container where any experience can unfold, be recognized, welcomed, and sustained.”

“If you are not able to hold space for yourself, how good is the quality of you holding space for someone else?”

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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00:00 Intro
01:15 Welcome & the context: cocooning in the darkest time of the year
05:35 The experiment: blocked vision, masks on
06:37 Game: Brewing a witchy cauldron for holding space
12:33 Stories of mountains
18:53 The mountain’s consciousness
23:08 Inside the mouth of a volcano
28:37 What is holding space about?
36:00 Making your energy available: healing circle in Brazil
40:33 Center yourself first: holding space in breathwork
43:06 Holding space through the body: the daughter’s feet story
46:41 Providing an energetic blueprint
49:12 Becoming the container: expanded boundaries and blown glass
57:25 Holding space for others vs holding space for yourself
1:00:42 Do you need to know yourself to hold space?
1:06:53 Holding space as creating a container for emergence
1:13:50 Nature as anchor: the forest that made you whole
1:18:37 Referencing self vs referencing externals
1:24:22 Masks off: reflections on the darkness experiment
1:26:47 Parting reflections
1:33:20 Outro

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Who are we when we don’t know who we are?

Life In Flow — Thu, 05 Mar 2026 16:11:47 GMT

Greeting from flow!

We are back again with a new episode, and it’s an unusual one.

Some conversations have a mind of their own and go in unexpected directions. In this episode, we started off trying to answer one question, but in the end, the discussion flowed, making us explore something that was emerging in the field even though we were not aware of it.

From identity changes to cultivating the garden of our inner parts to the elusive existence of the “true self”, it all could be described by one question: what happens when we stop trying to be someone?

In flow,

Irina, Polina and Yulia

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Things that were said:

“If you couldn't be someone for a month — no identity at all — what would life be like? Maybe not knowing isn't emptiness. Maybe it's a state that allows us to flow.”

“True self might be less about a singular identity and more about an energetic frequency that remains constant even as our parts and roles shift through different contexts.”

“We’re never truly alone. Even when I'm the only human in the room, the trees shape us, the moon affects us, the wind influences us. Our identity exists in a porous way, always co-creating.”

"Our internal system is more like a forest. It's wild, interconnected, full of involution — everything getting involved with everything all the time, with outcomes that are just not predictable."

“We perform not just for others, but for ourselves too. I react and feel in certain ways when I’m completely alone, just because that’s my identity — that’s who I assume I am. But that’s just one of my identities.”

"Identity is something we identify with. The social identity is the mask I put on to fit in. But even when I take it off, I might just put on a different mask that I believe is the 'real me’."

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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00:00 Intro
01:15 Welcome & setting the stage
02:33 The Game: Identity as a costume
20:02 Working with inner parts: a machine or a garden?
37:06 Inner scapes: cultivated garden vs wild forest
44:18 What collapses when you stop performing?
52:43 Being, soul, ego & the Forrest Gump question
1:03:16 The fluidity of identity
1:06:11 The energetic frequency of who we are
1:09:07 The true self — does it exist?
1:14:11 Shapeshifting
1:17:11 We are humus
1:20:30 What identity is dissolving, forming, emerging?
1:34:31 Parting reflections
1:37:54 Outro

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What to Do With the Ego?

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 19 Feb 2026 11:55:16 GMT

Greetings,

Yes, we, the children of modernity and Western civilization, might be egocentric and egoistic. Self- and planet-distructively so.

Yet, is the ego to blame? Or is the ego an organic product of the social, political, and economic configurations that we live under?

In this episode, we explore the ego not as an enemy to destroy, but as a fluid interface between consciousness and the world.

Through reflections on creative collaboration, improv, and the art of being selfish, we discover that the real problem isn’t having an ego — it’s losing awareness when one of our personas hijacks the controls.

In flow,

Irina, Polina and Yulia

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Polina

“The stronger those impulses get — of not being heard, not being allowed to be yourself — it accumulates into this big ball. Then you’re going to be hijacked, and the observer is going to be swept away because it doesn’t know how to hold intensity.”
“The ego is like an interface — my human interface for living and dealing with people and society. It’s how people are able to interact with me, make sense of me, exchange with me.”
“Society prescribes numbness: let's manage this, let's numb the pain, let's lower the intensity on how much we feel. But the real answer is learning to welcome and occupy our impulses with an observer in place.”

Yulia

“We’re 99% water by molecule count. Terrestrial life is basically water that found its way outside of the ocean, able to make its own waves. The tendency to flow is inherent to the ego.”
“I can choose to play a bitch. But when I consciously play, even if I identify with the bitch in this moment, it’s my decision. But as soon as I really become a bitch — that means something else took over. That’s the problem.”
“When I’m playing a role, my mature adult self chooses to act a certain way because this is the best way of interfacing. But if I become that thing, I lose the multidimensionality of myself and go full way into it. Then it sucks.”
“The way our egos show up is not an individual responsibility. There are forces at play — in society, in civilization — much bigger than individuals. We’re interconnected. Recognize that and give yourself a break.”

Irina

“Selfishness seems to be about putting the self in the first place. It’s about defining and defending the borders. Here is me. And being selfish is to be oneself.”
“If we are not allowed to be selfish and full self, we end up flowing into the other not from a sense of fullness, but from a sense of push. We get amplified, distorted selfishness that wants to occupy the whole space of the other.”
“The ego is shape-shifting, a product of both the subconscious histories inside and the outside conditions. It’s fluid, constantly reshaping itself depending on the circumstances.”

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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00:00 — What Should We Do With the Ego?
03:09 — When Ego Disrupts Group Flow
07:20 — Why “Getting Rid of the Ego” Doesn’t Work
11:40 — Ego as Boundary: Where the Self Begins
15:46 — What Happens When the Self Has No Borders
21:21 — Ego as the Interface Between Inner and Outer Worlds
23:46 — Identity as a Living, Shifting Narrative
30:20 — Why Structure Is Necessary for Flow
34:55 — When the Word “Ego” Gets in the Way
38:53 — When Ego Shifts From Play Into Control
43:49 — Playing a Role vs Being Taken Over by It
49:20 — Intensity Isn’t the Problem — Loss of Awareness Is
54:30 — The Observer Helps, But It’s Not the Whole Answer
1:05:10 — Living With the Ego Instead of Fighting It
1:10:38 — Staying in Relationship With Ego Over Time

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How to navigate between doing and being?

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 05 Feb 2026 12:30:04 GMT

Greetings,

I (Yulia) came to the episode hoping to find a specific answer, that my whole life has been keeping me moving and doing even in times when I was physically sick, or emotionally and mentally stretched to a point of breaking.

I wanted some tips on how to be more. Yet, this is not what happened during this conversation. The flow took us into a rabbit hole of trying to understand what being even means.

We did go on a rich journey though that left us with aha moments, posed questions that hadn’t been in our awareness before and reminded us of the deep intention behind these improvised conversations. They are no meant to give answers. They are spaces for creative and intuitive exploration. For navigating the Flow of Life.

You are in for cats, human bodies, collective consciousness, and a windy path they take us on. Paths are meant to be windy, though, aren’t they?

We wonder what this conversation stirs in you.

In flow,

Irina, Polina and Yulia

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Polina

“Being is more like letting go and fully occupying whatever the experience or the moment is. It’s like you were on your toes, and then you went down and could feel all of your feet.”
“Five minutes, if I just let myself fully occupy each minute, could actually feel like a very long stretch of time. It changed the experience completely — that’s a marker of being.”
“Collective being — what would it feel like if we all collectively just turned off the doing and the value systems and relaxed into being? It’s intoxicatingly beautiful. Worth living for.”

Yulia

“Laziness for me is a forbidden fruit. It feels like anxiety and guilt, like a stone in my chest. But it’s also a dirty little secret — a naughty little secret.”
“What place do I occupy if I’m just being? It’s almost like something I haven’t even fully been able to explore. What would truly being be like?”
“The digital world pulls me into a vortex. I’m very sensitive to the increase in speed, to the difference in energy. And once I start moving fast, I cannot stop.”

Irina

“If I found myself on an uninhabited island with no one to share my creation with, I’m not sure I would be creating. Even action born from my unique expression is influenced by social conditioning.”
“I don’t think it makes sense to oppose being to doing. We can be in being while doing—it depends on the plane we’re talking about.”
“Humans struggle with knowing who they are because we look for the answer in cognition and reflection, and that’s not where being lives.”

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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00:00 — Welcome to Life in Flow
01:52 — “Staying in Bed for Two Weeks!?”
05:28 — “Laziness Feels Like Anxiety and Guilt”
08:40 — Are We Afraid of Being?
09:05 — “My Biggest Fear Is Not Being Valuable”
10:46 — Doing as a Condition for Love
12:45 — “What Place Do I Occupy If I’m Just Being?”
14:46 — Helping, Saving, and Moral Worth
18:08 — Occupying the State of Being
20:45 — Essence vs State: Ser and Estar
24:45 — Visible vs Invisible Planes
27:40 — Does Being Require Awareness?
35:30 — Being and what shapes identity (outside in or vice versa?)
47:57 — What else can be occupying my state?
1:14:00 — What Would Help Us Live More in Being?
1:14:53 — How We Can Shift Time
1:23:27 — Collective Being and Shared Fields

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What Makes Us Valuable?

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 22 Jan 2026 09:53:08 GMT

Greetings,

We are flowing with value today. Which for all three of us has presented quite a lot of challenges. Some, being revealed as life stories.

In this one you are in for some deep personal stories. Of growing up with obligations or requests to demonstrate our value. Wondering what those might bring into your awareness.

Measured value, whether openly stated or masqued and hidden is deeply rooted in how we relate to ourselves and the world, we find.

How do you relate to value? As assigned to self, life, other humans?

In flow,

Irina, Polina and Yulia

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Irina

"I came into this world to fulfill the ideals and dreams of my parents. I was good from moment zero of my life. And so this equation was created: we love you because you're good."
"Value always involves evaluation. There's a part that is being evaluated and a part that is creating this evaluation. So am I worthy enough to create this beauty, this expansion?"
"Maybe there's no such thing as inherent value. Because for value to exist, there should be another one to create this value. Even self-love — there should be two of me: the one who gives value and the one who has value."

Yulia

“I’ve had quite a few experiences where what I thought was valuable was clearly not seen as such by other people. That mismatch made me wonder—what is valuable, what makes it valuable, and to whom?”
“Lately, I realized that I’ve become quite scared and apprehensive about the word valuable. I think it’s the word that I’ve been operating by in many interactions, especially in a business context, and it’s really hard to find a place where this value is actually shared.”
“In nature, I don’t need to demonstrate anything to anyone. Whatever value is, no one cares—and that feels like radical acceptance.”

Polina

"The word value originally meant to be strong, to be well, to be worthy. It wasn't about how much something was worth — it was about being alive."
"I experienced not being good from the very get-go. So I learned that being good was a game — a way to get access to more safety and predictability. But that original sense of 'just let me be me' was there the entire time."
"When children are simply noticed instead of evaluated, they don't stop seeking connection — they just find it through presence instead of approval."

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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00:00 – Welcome to Life in Flow
2:52 – Valere: value as strength + aliveness (not performance, achievement, or proving).
16:07 – Worthiness in the body: tightness, anxiety, and bracing for judgment.
19:50 – When value collapses: freeze response, numbness, and “nothing matters” energy.
21:10 – Beauty, femininity, and worthiness: expansion vs the mind’s “it’s unsafe.”
23:04 – The body’s deeper question: “Am I beautiful enough to expand into the world?”
31:52 – When value becomes a system: conditioning, hierarchy, and who gets to feel chosen.
36:52 – Childhood conditioning: how being “good” becomes the currency of love.
37:54 – People-pleasing decoded: earning approval instead of living from truth.
44:01 – Rebellion vs perfectionism: different strategies, same wound—“I must earn love.”
52:45 – External validation vs authenticity—and the paradox of becoming “invaluable.”
53:07 – The fake scoreboard: the moment you see external value isn’t real (but still runs us).
54:00 – “Invaluable” as a spiritual paradox: beyond measurement, status, and comparison.
55:20 – Cracking the Shell: releasing the identity built to prove your worth.
59:33 – A kindergarten bans “good”: what changes when praise is removed from identity.
1:21:43 – Healing value: what if we stop measuring ourselves completely and just be?

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What Do We Do When Everything is Dark?

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 08 Jan 2026 10:55:57 GMT

Greetings from the darkest time of the year here, in the Northern hemisphere. Darkness reigns at its height.

Trees are dreaming. Fungi and flowers cocooning in the underworld. Remaining birds are speaking in subdued tones.

We, humans, are not much different than the wild creatures in how darkness metamorphoses us.

It plays on our ‘darkness receptors‘ penetrating us through the eyes. Firmly directing us to rest, dream, hibernate.

It calls us into the void of mystery, that can feel like longing, loss of orientation, or pain that has its roots in places and times not of the present.

Resisting will only dissipate precious energy.

So, why not surrender to darkness, as the force that will find its way into our bodies and souls. Through the thickest armour.

It’s what this exploration is about.

We are not saying darkness is easy. Or there are ways to always find positives in those dark caves.

Instead exploring the mighty primordial force with respect and curiosity. As rich space beyond clear definitions.

What are you learning about darkness?

Irina

“Darkness shows me the limits of my agency.”
“It’s not the darkness itself that hurts, but my resistance to it.”
“When I stop trying to change the darkness, something else becomes available.”

Yulia

“At first it felt threatening, but then it became intimate.”
“The dark was not empty—it was full of sensations.”
“There was a strange pleasure in not knowing where things were going.”

Polina

“There’s a particular exhaustion that comes from trying to fix what cannot be fixed.”
“Darkness invited me to stop producing and start digesting.”
“It felt like the system finally had permission to rest.”

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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00:00 – Welcome to Life in Flow
01:42 – When Nothing Works: The Experience of Hitting Darkness
05:10 – Refusing the Pain Olympics
07:29 – Working With the Body, Not the Story
08:15 – Metaphors of Darkness: Wells, Labyrinths, Monsters
10:48 – “No One Is Coming to Save Me”
14:47 – The Weight That Changes Reality
17:25 – Building Somatic Resilience Before Going Deeper
21:41 – Nature as a Regulator: Receiving Strength From the Outside
26:27 – Facing Fear With a Steady Core
31:26 – Trusting the Pull of the Future
38:57 – The Spiral: Power That Can Destroy or Create
42:10 – What Darkness Is Actually Teaching Us
52:23 – Darkness as Hibernation, Not Failure
1:10:41 – The Gifts of Darkness & What Emerged

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What is Loneliness About?

Yulia Bogdanova — Fri, 26 Dec 2025 15:06:21 GMT

Greetings,

And Happy Holidays if you are celebrating.

It’s interesting that the publication of this episode should land during the biggest Western holidays of the year. Because paradoxically, this time can feel piercingly lonely, would you say?

If holidays are feeling lonely to you, please know you are not alone. I, Yulia have been wondering lately how it came to that and what holidays are about beyond their modern form.

Deep time ago holidays seem to have been about embodied enactments of oneness, between humans and non-human beings. Time of facilitated ecstatic rupture, and the collective state of remembering ourselves and our place in this world.

I wonder what it might have been like.

Meanwhile, I am feeling protective of my loneliness among the ubiquitous lights and the loud cheer. Imagining myself in a tiny hut in the middle of a forest, haha.

Wondering how this time feels to you? Might be very different from Yulia’s experience. However it is, we welcome and honor that.

Irina

“Loneliness is the pain of existential separateness.”
“It’s a state where there is no reflection, no echo coming back.”
“Loneliness is when the system collapses into a single point and looks for source.”

Yulia

“Loneliness has a certain sharpness to it, like something piercing.”
“Loneliness made me relate differently to nature, to trees, to silence.”
“There was no one to mirror me, and that changed how I experienced myself.”

Polina

“Some of my deepest loneliness happened while I was surrounded by people.”
“Being alone gave me space, but loneliness asked a much harder question.”
“Loneliness is an existential question.”

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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00:00 — Welcome to Life in Flow
01:22 — When Loneliness Takes Over
03:24 — What Loneliness Feels Like (Before We Explain It)
08:53 — When You’re the Only Witness
10:35 — Depth, Dark & Light, Song, Beauty
13:22 — Alone Isn’t the Same as Lonely
17:29 — Loneliness in Loud Rooms
21:22 — Being the Only One
23:26 — Losing the Knife
26:37 — What Exile Does to the Body
32:29 — When the Group No Longer Fits
35:22 — More Than the Human Animal
45:37 — What Loneliness Is Shaping
50:39 — Remembering Love
01:10:32 — Loneliness is a state that needs to be shaped

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On Radical Acceptance

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 11 Dec 2025 09:36:50 GMT

The year is coming to a close. And the three of us are feeling the pull of thresholds. Some invisible, some marked by big '“outside“ changes. Of countries, priorities, and routines.

We are curious how it’s unfolding for you at the moment?

In today’s episode, we’re exploring what it is like to listen without filters. When the intention is radical acceptance and welcoming, how does it affect the flow between us?

Polina

“Do you want me to listen just to hold space because you need to get some stuff out and you don’t want any advice?”
“Filters can really change the way we hear and how we listen and what experience we’re providing for the person that is speaking with us.”
“Radical acceptance, approval, and granting something as real, can be an extraordinary shift.”

Irina

“The way we listen, whether there’s judgment or not, and how we relate to the tension in the body, all of those things mix into our ability to flow together.”
“This kind of interaction (listening without filters) requires a new set of skills. It requires deliberate practice, an intention from all the participants, a willingness to learn this new interaction.”
“The mere question invites us to become aware: what am I saying, why am I saying it this way? Unconsciously, we do want to cause something.”

Yulia

“Until the things that bubble me up are voiced out and I just release this steam, no more constructive steps are possible towards transformation of the system.”
“There are not many people that I’ve met who are able just to hold the basket and really create that space where I feel safe in offloading myself and not loading them with my stuff.”
“I alone won’t cause anything. Maybe something is being initiated through me. Being aware and curious what other forces are involved is super important.”

What are some of your most memorable moments of being fully accepted and held?

If anything you heard or read here resonated, do let us know. We would be delighted to connect.

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

📍Chapters

00:00 – Welcome to Life in Flow
03:16 – A Game That Loosens the Mind
08:46 – How Reality Lands in the Body
09:28 – The Hidden Pressure Behind Listening
15:18 – How Judgment Silences Connection
17:03 – The Listening Question That Changes Everything
19:52 – The Courage to Ask for How You Want to Be Heard
22:29 – Agreements That Make Space Sacred
29:18 – How Taking Things Inward Changes the Field
37:09 – When Presence Becomes the Only Way Forward
47:02 – Trusting What Emerges Beyond the Rational Mind
57:42 – Radical Acceptance: Meeting in the Human Center
01:06:12 – Welcoming vs. Filtering: The Felt Difference
01:14:52 – The Inner Question Shaping the Field
01:33:19 – Surrendering the Perfect Self to Let Flow Lead

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How to Feel Part of Something Bigger?

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 27 Nov 2025 16:00:25 GMT

November Greetings!

Feeling part of something bigger…

What does it mean? Why do humans look for this feeling, and how does it show up in the body?

The conversation moves through transcendence, belonging, approval, coherence, not belonging, and moments of silence.

We talk about sadness that expands and contracts, about being held by the breath of life, about crossing borders and never belonging to one world, about coherence, and more.

Irina

“Sadness is the process of transforming pain into love.”
“I felt the pain of the world transforming in my heart into love.”
“Any tiny shift in the state of one person creates a shift in the state of the whole system.”
“The experience of being held by life was so moving and unexpected.”

Yulia

“My nature is about crossing the borders… I’m always connecting worlds.”
“Group flow creates this good sensation that there is a place for me here.”
“When social conditioning was removed, I was just being content in love and totally connected to everyone in the room.”

Polina

“Going beyond the limits of something has been the name of the game for me.”
“Immigrating to another country was a transcendent experience, like landing on the moon.”
“Maybe belonging is when I feel welcome, when there is space for me, and when I am approved without having to perform.”

What does feeling part of something bigger mean for you?

If anything you heard or read here resonated, do let us know. We would be thrilled to hear from you!

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

📍Chapters

00:00 – Welcome to Life in Flow
04:21 – Somatic Improvisation Game: “Transcendence”
06:40 – Sadness as a Pathway to Love
09:19 – Touching the River of Collective Emotion
12:06 – Going Beyond Your Human Form
16:01 – Transforming Pain Through Generations
20:11 – Transcendence as a Daily Life Practice
21:15 – Transcendence as a Hobby
24:36 – Moments When We Felt Part of Something Greater
31:06 – Belonging to Your Own Timeline
40:17 – The Power of Deep, Unquestionable Approval
53:39 – Can Belonging Be Created on Purpose?
57:58 – Higher Self, Energy Work, and Self-Approval
01:00:16 – Peeling Away Social Conditioning & Becoming Porous
01:11:23 – Being Held by Life, Nature, and Other Humans
01:18:12 – What We’re Taking With Us

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Who Are We Beyond Social Conditioning?

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 13 Nov 2025 13:14:44 GMT

Greetings!

Today, we explore who we are outside the human systems that shaped us.

We start with the image of humans living in a “zoo,” surrounded by rules and beliefs that can feel like our own voice but were often learned.

As we talk, this image opens into questions about what happens when those structures disappear, when the roles and the stories that organized our lives no longer tell us where to go.

What is left when we are not a role, not a name, not the expectations that tell us what a “well-lived life” looks like?

Yulia

“We humans also kind of live in a zoo. But do we really know what we need and what’s important to us?”
“The question of who we are beyond social roles always brings me to the mirror—when I really look into my own eyes, I meet something alien, not of this world.”
“When I connected deeply to nature, it was as if the removal of all the social rules created a clearing and more access to my ancient self.”

Irina

“We are animals—and we are social animals. The biology and the social nature are part of the same soup.”
“Even if you remove yourself from society, you’re still interacting with something that shapes you.”
“The conditioning is inevitable. You leave the city, and you’re conditioned by the forest, by the environment.”

Polina

“Removing myself from all the zoos—the work zoo, the family zoo, the New York zoo—was the first time I began to integrate who I actually am.”
“I think the way we navigate it is through awareness and choice—owning what’s emerging, and deciding which part of me I want to give voice to.”
“I have the right to change my mind, to be different in the next season of life. That’s part of the evolution.”

Who are YOU beyond all the social roles that first come to mind?”

Thanks for being here. Till next time!

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

📍Chapters

00:00 – Welcome to Life in Flow
01:42 – What shapes us? The unseen force of conditioning
03:11 – The Zoo Game: how environments train us
07:17 – Are we living in invisible cages?
08:33 – Instinct vs. obedience: the “leash effect”
12:52 – When love becomes a role you must perform
16:38 – Family scripts: responsibility, success & pressure
23:25 – The inner check: “Is this actually me?”
25:04 – The motherhood story: desire, biology, or expectation?
29:49 – Identity at the crossroads of culture and biology
37:22 – Beyond roles: touching the essence of who we are
43:57 – Gender and identity: the fluid self beneath the labels
48:42 – Rediscovering the wild self through nature
1:04:57 – You’re always conditioned by something—so what frees you?
1:06:32 – Choosing your way: awareness, fluidity, and self-trust

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What Makes Relationships Meaningful?

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 30 Oct 2025 18:50:45 GMT

Greetings!

In today’s episode, we explore what makes our relationships meaningful.

We talk about resonance, exchange, reflection, and the space we occupy in each other’s being.

Sometimes it feels like ease, and sometimes like tension. Meaning, we discover, isn’t fixed.

It arises in connection, in awareness, and in how we meet each other — again and again.

Irina

“For me, a relationship becomes meaningful when there is a certain resonance — a connection at any level.”
“It may last just a few moments, or it may stay for years.”
“Sometimes it’s shared values, sometimes shared worldview, or simply the sense that something registers between us.”
“Even difficult relationships that reflect something back to me — those can be the most meaningful.”
“I’m leaving with this idea of what the relationship allows for: learning, development, and the possibility of group flow.”

Yulia

“A meaningful relationship has a body — it occupies space in my being.”
“It’s about diffusion — something of me and something of the other person exchange and stay.”
“Conflict is part of it. There is so much energy in conflict, in tension. Without it, everything gets flat.”

Polina

“Meaning for me right now is the ability to be real — to share what’s easy and what’s hard.”
“It’s not about being perfect; it’s about cleaning things up, clarifying, finding our way through the dark together.”
“Maybe meaning isn’t always shared. Sometimes it’s what happens inside me — the reflection that changes how I see myself.”

📍Chapters

00:00 – Welcome to Life in Flow
12:26 – Losing Meaning by Defining It
15:44 – Resonance as the Heart of Connection
20:21 – Diffusion: When We Occupy Each Other
33:13 – The Wall of Pretending vs. Realness
41:40 – Imperfection, Repair, and Growth
47:29 – Painful Reflections in Relationships
48:52 – Why Conflict Creates Meaningful Bonds
51:26 – Can Harmony Exist Without Conflict?
59:55 – Healthy Conflict as Growth Engine
1:01:05 – Linking vs. Merging (Dan Siegel)
1:03:05 – Penetration as a Metaphor for Meaningful Depth
1:05:26 – The Felt Sense of Meaningfulness
1:17:19 – Group Flow and Belonging to More
1:25:30 – When “Meaningful” Isn’t: Family & Re-Negotiation

Thanks for being here. Till next time!

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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Who created the world

Yulia Bogdanova — Fri, 17 Oct 2025 12:02:01 GMT

Fall greetings 🍂

In today’s episode, we talk about creation—who or what made the world, how we each imagine the beginning, and what it means to trust life.

What are we really trusting? Is there a higher intelligence, a God, a living Earth? Or are we part of a self-organizing system of consciousness exploring itself?

In this episode, we share myths of origin and our own ideas.

A star exploding from loneliness, Gaia dreaming through us, bacteria learning to move—each story opens a different window into creation.

We play, wonder aloud, and imagine.

Irina

“I like to think of creation as an act of self-awareness—a single consciousness realizing itself and multiplying like mirrors reflecting mirrors.”
“Maybe the Big Bang was not an explosion, but an awakening.”
“For me, God is life itself—a self-organizing intelligence that allows everything to exist and evolve.”
“When we remember we are part of this system, not separate from it, we stop acting like the cancer of the world and start flowing with it.”

Yulia

“I see Gaia as the creative force—the Earth herself experimenting with different ways of sensing and being.”
“She’s in constant creative flow, not controlling but participating, like a dancer improvising with the cosmos.”
“The more I connect to plants, the more I feel their messages of protection and wisdom.”
“To surrender to life is to trust this vast, intelligent web that’s far beyond human control.”

Polina

“Maybe we’re walking plants—life deciding to move, to explore, to play.”
“I don’t know if consciousness comes from matter or the other way around. Maybe both.”
“When I surrender, I’m trusting my higher self and the energy that permeates everything.”
“Perhaps the voices we call guardian angels are just other expressions of energy—us meeting ourselves beyond time.”

Join us in reconnecting with the vast, playful mystery that made us.

📍Chapters

0:00 – Welcome to Life in Flow
1:47 – Today’s Big Question: Who Created the World?
2:20 – Trust, Surrender, and the Flow of Life
3:54 – Fireplace Game: Our Myth of Origin
14:21 – What creation stories do we tell ourselves?
18:40 – The Big Bang: Self-Awareness Multiplying
20:06 – Gaia as Living Creator: Earth’s Experiments with Life
23:33 – Interconnectedness of Rocks, Plants, and Humans
25:05 – Walking Plants and the Spark of Life
26:51 – Consciousness vs. Matter: Which Came First?
29:01 – Is There a God? Definitions, Doubts & Beliefs
30:19 – Nature, Time, and the Creative Flow of Gaia
36:53 – Energy, Frequency, and the Greater Intelligence
41:16 – Observers, IFS, and Non-Human Perspectives
44:08 – Stardust and Human Origins
46:07 – Life as God: The Self-Organizing System
50:51 – Guardian Angels, Higher Self, and Spiritual Guides
59:03 – Surrendering Control: Who Do We Trust?
1:01:46 – Final Reflections on Interconnectedness and Flow

Thanks for being here. Till next time!

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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How Trance Shapes Our Lives

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 02 Oct 2025 18:45:15 GMT

In this episode we talk about trance—what it feels like, why it matters, and how it shows up in everyday life.

For many, the word trance carries baggage. In the Western world, it’s often associated with drugs, “woo-woo” practices, or the loss of control.

But what if trance is simply part of being human?

In this conversation, we reclaim trance as an everyday passage from the ordinary into the extraordinary—a natural state that brings flexibility, creativity, and flow back into our lives.

Yulia

“Trance is any state different from the ordinary state of consciousness.”
“Without trance, life gets stuck. It brings flexibility and flow back into our experience.”
“For me, trance is a way to cross a threshold—from the mundane into the extraordinary.”
“Music, breathwork, dance, even cold water—they all can open the door into trance.”

Irina

“For me, trance is an altered state, a shift of perception. I notice it because something in me is aware: oh, this is different now.”
“It’s like inviting all parts of myself to have tea together—voices that were shut down by the rational mind finally get heard.”
“Trust is part of trance—allowing what is larger than me to guide the moment.”

Polina

“I used to think trance was only about drugs or mystical rituals. Now I see it in reading, traveling, even falling in love.”
“So much of my childhood was spent in trance—lost in books, worlds, and imagination.”
“This conversation converted me—I’ll never see trance the same way again.”

Tune in to hear how we each experience trance, what practices help us enter it, and why reclaiming this word might just make life more alive.

📍Chapters

0:00 – Welcome to Life in Flow
1:15 – Why Trance? Setting the Stage
4:27 – The Nectar Game: Stories Begin
5:17 – Gods, Nectar, and Energy Currents
6:54 – Birds, Flowers & Everyday Nectar
8:27 – Mango Nectar & Wim Hof Adventures
12:36 – The Mother’s Nectar
14:59 – Trance & Nectar: Etymology Unveiled
17:44 – Defining Trance States Together
24:55 – Why We Seek Trance
33:32 – Trance as Beauty & Breath of Fresh Air
37:15 – Reading, Travel, and Everyday Trance
46:13 – Trust, Allowing, and Healthy Altered States
54:14 – Love, Sex, and Orgasm as Trance States
56:38 – Connection with Nature & Extreme Sports
1:01:44 – How We Enter Trance: Practices & Rituals
1:06:26 – Takeaways: Reclaiming Trance for Everyday Life

Thanks for being here. Till next time!

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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What is intuition?

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 18 Sep 2025 14:08:36 GMT

In this episode we talk about intuition—what it feels like in the body, how it shows up in everyday life, and how hard it can be to trust it.

We share personal stories, times when intuition was clear, and times when doubt got in the way. We also touch on collective intuition and what it means to slow down enough to listen.

Yulia

“My body is doing something that the mind cannot explain—and I allow myself not to resist it.”
“Plants and trees are powerful co-regulation forces… their slower intelligence helps me slow down.”
“Improv is the only conscious practice I’ve had of collective intuition—it’s fun when it works.”

Irina

“Sometimes intuition is expansion in the body; sometimes it’s contraction. The clues are subtle.”
“Trust is an exercise—trust in my inner voice, myself, the field, the world.”
“Intuition is not just gut feeling—it can come from the field around me, beyond the body.”

Polina

“Even though we had no idea what we were doing, the pull to start this podcast was undeniable.”
“There’s such a difference between waiting and avoiding—and learning to sense which is which.”
“The more I slow down, the more reality shifts—almost like tuning to another frequency.”

Tune in to hear how we each experience intuition and what practices help us stay connected to it.

📍Chapters

0:00 – Welcome to Life in Flow
1:20 – What Do We Mean by Intuition?
3:32 – The “First Sense” Intuition Game
6:05 – Human Design & the Body’s Yes
8:15 – When Willpower Overrides Intuition
9:23 – The Pull: How Intuition Feels in the Body
10:42 – Everyday Intuition: Shopping, Pots & Garden Clues
17:29 – Intuition & Action: Act Now or Wait?
18:24 – Intuition or Avoidance? How to Tell the Difference
23:19 – Expansion vs Contraction: Embodied Signals
30:39 – Reading the Field: Plants & Patterns of Life
33:25 – Micro-Divination: Books, Lines & Random Clues
41:33 – Tools for Trusting Intuition
1:06:51 – Collective Intuition: When the Group Knows
1:10:30 – Instinct vs Intuition
1:18:00 – Closing Reflections: Living a Life Guided by Intuition

Thanks for being here. Till next time!

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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Is the world alive?

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 04 Sep 2025 11:16:39 GMT

This conversation was both challenging and fun. Our background as rational, intelligent beings taught us for decades that even suggesting that the world could be alive is absurd.

“I wasn’t sure I would be able to discuss it publicly… You cannot be intelligent and then at the same time believe that the world is alive, right?” Yulya

And yet, we dare to ponder: what if the world isn’t just scenery — but a conscious participant in our lives?

“Life becomes much more fun… so many agents you can interact with and co-create with.” Irina

What might shift if we stopped acting like we’re the only ones in the room — and started co-creating with the world?

“If everything’s alive, that means I need to be even more aware… and at first it seems like, oh shit, I don’t have the resources for this.” Polina

📍Chapters

0:00 – Welcome to Life in Flow
2:06 – The “Dangerous” Question: Is the World Alive?
5:25 – Forest Grandfather & the Mushroom Gift
11:31 – Fairy Tales, Magic & Growing Up Rational
13:05 – Neznaika & the Beginner’s Mind
20:30 – What Does It Mean for the World to Be Alive?
23:00 – The World as Actor with Its Own Agency
25:00 – Trees, Rocks & Stones with a Billion-Year Agenda
31:20 – Frequencies, Energy & Data as Aliveness
35:45 – Talking to Objects: Cars, Computers & More
44:35 – Listening to the Bluff & Roots
47:23 – Nonverbal Dialogue with Birds
50:54 – Before & After: Living as if the World Is Alive
56:24 – Sigh of Relief: Surrender & Co-Creation with Life
1:06:47 – Closing Reflections: Rocks, Play & Flow

We’d be delighted to hear from you. If something lands, you have a story to share or to say hi.

Leave a comment

Thanks for being here. Till next time!

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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What does it mean to be connected?

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 21 Aug 2025 16:17:20 GMT

In this episode of Life in Flow, we invite you into our exploration of connection.

We begin with a simple game: telling short, sensory stories about connection. What emerges ranges from the gaze of a dog, to the sprouting of chickweed, to the memory of becoming one with a tree in India.

As you listen, you’ll hear us explore different qualities of connection:

the presence we feel in our bodies
the resonance that happens between people
the unseen energetic field that holds it all together

We also touch on disconnection—what it feels like to lose access, why filtering matters, and how sometimes stepping back is just as important as tuning in.

We’d be delighted to hear from you. If something lands, or you have a story to share. Or you’d like to connect.

Thanks for being here. Till next time!

Let it flow,

Polina, Irina, and Yulya

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How Does Trust Emerge?

Yulia Bogdanova — Thu, 07 Aug 2025 08:13:29 GMT

We are back with Episode 3!

In this episode, we explore trust not as a concept but as a lived, somatic experience.

Does trust begin as a decision, a sensation, or a surrender?

From blankets and breath to darkness and light, to improv and practice, we follow the subtle thread of what trust feels like — just before it arrives.

How do you sense trust?

What does it take to trust when the situation feels like a precipice?

We would be delighted to hear from you and to stay in touch!

Love,

Polina, Irina, and Yulia

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📍Chapters

00:00 Welcome – What Is Life in Flow?
01:15 The Central Question: How Does Trust Emerge?
02:07 Word Association Game on "Trust"
05:23 Warmth, Blankets & Somatic Memories
06:21 Precipice & The Leap of Faith
09:04 Slowing Down to Speed Up – Trust as Portal to Flow
11:14 Poetic Inquiry: Where Does Trust Begin?
14:05 Trust as State, Trait, or Conscious Choice
21:01 The Source of Trust & Sustaining the Unknown
29:38 Trust in the Mountain: External & Internal Anchors
38:53 Improv Comedy & Redefining Failure Through Trust
42:09 Wheel of Time, Trusting the River of Life & Surrender
47:06 Preparation vs. Control – Letting Trust Lead the Flow
49:55 Does Trust Always Lead to Flow?
53:35 Closing Reflections – Nature as a Source of Trust

🌱 Key Takeaways

Trust emerges from a combination of feeling, choice, and state.
Practicing trust means allowing what wants to emerge — even without knowing what it is.
Distrust, especially when rooted in personal or cultural history, may be a default — but it can shift through conscious practice.
Flow and trust are deeply connected, but one doesn’t always guarantee the other.
Trust isn’t about believing things will go the way we want — it’s about knowing we can sustain whatever happens.
This podcast itself is an experiment in group trust — in the process, in the field, and in each other.

💌 Stay in touch

1. Subscribe to Life in Flow Podcast
New episodes and practices, shared as they emerge.
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